The thrill of what’s next
You tend to approach love the way you approach a new country: with lots of enthusiasm, not a lot of research and a good story at the end. Laughing together is a real turn-on, and so is a person who’s game for anything. Long periods of sameness can dampen your desire far more than any quarrel would. Someone with a strong belief, a bold plan or a real sense of adventure tends to spark something, and you like knowing that you can leave the house at any moment, even if you don’t.
You also have a lot of physical energy. Long walks, hard climbs and open roads aren’t just hobbies here. They keep you pleasant to be around.
The truth, at full volume
In a disagreement you say exactly what you think, and you might think that settles it. Your honesty can be a relief to some, and it can also feel like being hit by a friendly truck. You may turn an ordinary disagreement into a matter of principle, then wonder why your partner’s so upset when you were only being accurate.
You can run, too. When an argument drags on, you might grab your keys and leave, physically or by promising you’ll think about it. Or you might go looking for a rule to break, just to feel that nobody’s in charge of you. Check whether what you’re pushing against is actually a rule, or only a person who loves you and wants to know when you’ll be home.
A small adjustment helps a lot here: ask “Do you want my honest opinion?” Then, if they do, tell them one true thing and not nine. Honesty counts for more when there’s care in it. And no amount of straight talking justifies belittling someone or making them feel small.
Keeping pace
Give them room to move, and go along for some of it. Say plainly when a joke has gone too far, because they’d honestly like to know. Bringing up serious matters on a walk works better than at a table. They tend to think better on their feet, and they’ll be calmer once they’ve used up a bit of that energy.